Monday, May 7, 2012

start a new

This is a new day, here in France, and my heart is happy.

Yesterday, we celebrated with our neighbors, then we went to the Bastille, and it was beautiful to see this crowd: happy, joyful, and driven by the same desire to change and start a new.

Like in politics, I feel like it's time for a change in my life too. Not a big change, but a deep one. I started cleaning out the closets and getting rid of all the things that I have collected through the years and never use. It's painful for me to separate from material things, especially baby and children clothes, but I can't stand the mess and the stuffy closets anymore. I allowed myself to keep a small box with clothes that no one will probably ever wear again, dresses and pants that I associate so much with moments spent with my children, I just can't give them away, even to my niece, and I need to know they'll always be there. 
But I think that all the things we keep are like covers over time, layers of memories that we materialize in order not to forget. So I've decided to take pictures of some things that I will throw or give away and that I want to remember. A coat. A used baby sock. Drawings (oh my, I haven't gone through that yet...)

I wish I had a big cellar to put everything on the side without having to see it each time I open a closet. But I know it would just be the same. I remember my grandparents who used to collect everything, their house had become a gigantic mess of piles and broken things, it was almost unbearable to see, and it was hard to breathe just to be there. And when they died and my mother and aunt had to sell their house, we had to sort every single thing, throw away a ton of old magazines and stuff that made them feel safe. I want to be stronger than that, and try to feel safe without piling up things around me, like an armor against time and life.

This reminds me of one of my favorite songs ever.

Have a lovely week everybody.


Polly (nice kind of blue) said...

I like that you want to be strong by yourself without the need to make yourself feel safe surrounded by things. I think I should follow your lead. It's tough getting rid of things, but a great idea to keep a few precious items safe in a box along with photos of other things.

Anonymous said...

clear all that clutter is good for us and we feel lighter !

Round Circles said...

Hello Anabelle!
ça fait un moment que je ne suis plus trop présente:mai et tout les projets,les sorties,le travail....Bref la vie!
J'aime beaucoup tes préoccupations du moment.
Ici aussi on prend en photo ce qui nous tient à coeur et on fait le vide...J'ai ce besoin de vide depuis un petit moment déjà et plus ça vient,plus je vide!
On se sent plus légère tant physiquement que matériellement!
Merci pour cette vidéo:comme j'aime cette voix grave!
Bon week end Bella

Round Circles said...

Belle semaine!J'espère que tu peux faire le pont....Profite bien de ce férié en pleine semaine!

Anabelle said...

Merci Nora! Je ne fais pas le pont, mais ce soir, je suis sortie avec mon homme, c'était encore mieux que des vacances!!
Bise et profite du temps libre!

Ioana-Carmen said...

Love it darling!! maybe we can follow each others blog?! XoXo